Why Your Goals Are Failing: The Real Problem Isn't You, It's Your Routines

When I was younger, before I had kids, I ran several marathons. It’s a huge goal that you can’t achieve overnight. A marathon isn't a distance you can just go out and run without training. It takes months of running on an almost daily basis. My husband, who had never run before, started with just five minutes a day and was able to run his first marathon in a year. It is entirely possible, but it requires commitment. Most people treat their businesses like marathons they don't want to train for.

If you're a business owner who has ever asked, "why do my goals keep failing?" I want you to know something important: the problem isn't you. It’s not your ambition, and it’s not a lack of drive. The issue is a lack of time management for entrepreneurs and a reliance on daily routines that prioritize urgent distractions over important progress.

A marathon is a perfect example of a big goal that is only achievable through small, consistent, daily decisions. If I had trained doing the wrong thing or not trained at all, I would not have been able to finish the marathons. In our businesses, if we do the work sporadically or the wrong work, we won't reach our business goals. When we decide each day to respond to how we feel or what seems urgent at the moment—checking social media instead of building that webpage or answering a non-essential email instead of working on a strategic plan—we are essentially choosing not to train for our business marathon.

The truth is, as an entrepreneur with a focus on well-being, I've learned that being busy is not the same as being effective. The key to finding a life of balance and reaching your goals is to stop being reactive and to start building business routines that create real freedom.

From Firefighter to Flow State

You started your business with big goals. But if you’re like most business owners, you’re stuck in a whirlwind of daily chaos—constantly putting out fires, reacting to urgent emails, and feeling like you're never truly getting ahead. You’re working hard, but you’re not making progress on the things that really matter.

To stop putting out fires and start building the business of your dreams, you have to intentionally shift from a reactive mode to a proactive one. The key is to stop living in a state of high attention where your norepinephrine is constantly firing, keeping you on edge. This is a survival mechanism meant for short-term crises, not for the long haul. When we stay in this state, it shuts down the open, creative parts of our brain that we need to strategically grow our businesses.

This is a framework I work through with my clients, based on brain science and my own lived experience, to help them move from a state of overwhelm to a state of Flow.

• The Time-Wasters (Not Urgent & Not Important): This is the zone of busywork and regret. Here, you're zoning out on social media or scrolling through emails, which serves no real purpose. It only leads to more guilt and a feeling of falling behind.

• The Distraction Trap (Urgent & Not Important): This is the home of constant interruptions. You feel scattered, busy, and frustrated, putting in a lot of effort but making very little progress on your own goals because you're constantly responding to other people’s priorities.

• The Firefighter's Fray (Urgent & Important): This is the quadrant of constant crisis. Here, you're running on adrenaline, feeling overwhelmed, stressed, and exhausted. This is where you're putting out fires instead of building for the future.

• The Flow State (Not Urgent & Important): This is where true productivity and fulfillment live. Here, you feel in control, aligned, and intentional. You are working on what matters most—strategic planning, personal growth, and relationship-building—which creates a profound sense of purpose.

The Power of Purpose: The Science of Focus

The big revelation I had on my journey was this: Becoming an intentional entrepreneur is the only way to create a life of fulfillment. We all started our businesses to fulfill some dream of a better life, but we often push that dream off by responding to what feels urgent in our businesses today. The truth is, your business should fuel your life, not consume it.

In his classic book, Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill introduces the concept of a "Definite Purpose." He argues that having a clear, well-defined goal is the starting point of all achievement. It’s not enough to simply wish for success; you must have a burning desire and a tangible plan to get there.

This idea is backed by modern neuroscience. When you write down your goals and keep them in a place you see every day, you're not just creating a reminder—you're engaging your brain in a powerful way. This practice is known to:

• Improve Clarity and Focus: Writing a goal down forces your brain to clarify what you want. It transforms a vague idea into a concrete target. This process of “encoding” the information helps your brain prioritize it and filter out distractions that don’t align with your purpose.

• Enhance Motivation: Seeing your goals regularly strengthens the neural pathways associated with them. This constant reinforcement helps you stay motivated and persistent, especially on days when the work feels hard. A study by Dr. Gail Matthews found that people who wrote down their goals were 42% more likely to achieve them than those who only thought about them.

Think of your goals as a compass and a dashboard for your business. Just as a driver needs a dashboard to monitor speed and direction, a business owner needs a clear, visible reminder of their ultimate destination. This is why I encourage my clients to create a "North Star" document—a single piece of paper, a dashboard, or a notebook page where your most important goals are listed. This becomes your daily point of reference.

Your Path to a New Life

This is an area I work on with my clients every day. We start by getting really clear on what matters to them and then create systems to make consistent progress on those things.

• Your Personal Blueprint: Before you can build a system, you need to know what you’re building it for. I work with business owners to help them define what a fulfilling life looks like for them, so we can build a roadmap that aligns their business goals with their deepest desires. This is about designing your life, not just reacting to it.

• The SMARTER Growth Plan: It's not enough to just have a dream. You need a concrete, actionable plan. With my clients, we turn their dreams into SMARTER goals—goals that are Specific, Measurable, Actionable, Risky, Time-bound, Exciting, and Relevant.

• The Productivity Purge: You have to stop doing the work that drains your energy and focus on the tasks that bring you the most joy and impact. The answer isn't to just do more, but to do what matters. A great tool for this is a North Star Activity, which helps you decide what to eliminate, automate, and delegate so you can control your calendar and make progress on what really matters.

• Your Weekly Success Rhythm: Our brains naturally want to do what's easiest. So, make the right choices the easiest ones! I've found that time blocking is a game-changer. A Weekly Success Rhythm is a repeatable routine that ensures you have dedicated time for deep work, strategic planning, and, most importantly, rest and rejuvenation.

• Daily Intentions: The key to making progress on your big goals is to focus on what matters most each day. I call this the Daily Big 3. Instead of a massive to-do list, you identify your top three highest-impact tasks for the day. This simple habit keeps you focused and ensures you end each day with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

• The Perpetual Growth Plan: This isn't a one-and-done solution. The final key is to regularly check in with yourself and your systems. Take time each day or week to reflect on what worked and what didn't. This isn't about judgment; it's about learning and adjusting. When you celebrate your small wins and make small tweaks to your routines, you build momentum and stay motivated to make more positive decisions in the future, giving you the tools to thrive long after our work together is done.

  Take Action and Live Intentionally

  Imagine running a business that doesn't run you. A business that grows with intention, fueled by your unique strengths, and provides the freedom to live the life you've always dreamed of.

  My goal is to help you achieve true fulfillment through your business. However, these are ideas I have learned over decades, and I have only been able to show you the tip of the iceberg here. The best way to start implementing these ideas is to begin with the basics.

  Ready to stop feeling overwhelmed and start making real progress on your goals every day?

  Sign up for my free email course on achieving your goals and get started on your path to becoming an intentional entrepreneur.